Christmas 2009 is fast approaching, and if you haven’t already (like me) done your shopping for gifts, well, you should think about doing that sometime.

Traditionally, Christmas was to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.  At least that’s what some people call him.  No matter how you look at it, he has the best birthday party in the world.  Because every bastard celebrates.

Although, I guess if I wanted to be all PC, U should name this entry, Holiday Season.  But I’m not PC, so I won’t do that.  So if you’re offended, Friday the 25th is a great day for you to be working, now get to it.

Anyway.  This silly celebration has it’s good things.  We hear about them every year.  Family, Presents, Food, blah blah blah.  What we don’t hear often is the shit that comes with such a holiday.

First off.  We have Christmas in November.  Yep, because December 1, 25 days out from the actual day, is not enough time for us to really be reminded that it’s Christmas.  So most of November, we see all the sparkling lights, decorations and dicks is costume.

Second.  Christmas rolls around, and ever bastard and his dog wants to travel.  If you’re on the roads, you take your life in your own hands.  Soon enough we will hear about the road tolls.  NSW is currently winning.  Or, if you want to score like golf, the ACT has it covered.  You also have dicks with caravans.

Then we have shopping.  Yep, on a regular day, who doesn’t like spending money.  On themselves!  The fact that we have to go out, and spend our hard earned on every other bastard doesn’t make sense.  This is essentially, someone birthday.  So why aren’t we buying Jesus a present.

I hear your answer.  He’s no longer with us.  Well, then that negates the need for presents does it not?  Anyway, what a dick, I got a laptop for cxmas early, so lets forget about not giving presents.

Lets look at the Xmas specials every bastard has in their store.  Why do all the specials seem to cost more than what they did two months ago when the exact same product was not on special?  Greeeed.  Jesus has caused a lot of greed.  But good on him.

Christmas trees.  Why, for the love of God, would any sane individual want a pine tree in their living room?  It makes no sense.  If pine trees were meant to be inside, they would have adapted to growing in carpet, or hardwood floors.

I also feel sorry for Energex.  One one end of the scale, everyone is getting up the power companies for their coal power plants causing this made up Global Warming.  Whinge whinge whinge, coal is killing the world.  But then they go and put 60,000 little coloured, electric bulbs all around their house, which not only consumes more power, it also proves very difficult for the neighbours to sleep at night.

I do feel for the family next door in the house without aircon, next to a fool with all his lights.  They can’t close the windows, otherwise it’s too hot, because Xmas in QLD, it’s stupid hot.  And they can’t open them, because of the penetrating light.  But in saying that, they do look pretty cool at times, I’m just saying, why?

Don’t get me started on Santa…

Anyway.  Have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.